Tag Archives: Love

Three Common Temptations Based on Three Basic Human Needs

26 February 2013

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Embrace Your Identity in Christ: You are chosen (1 Peter 2:9) – You are worthy (1 Corinthians 6:11)

Embrace Your Identity in Christ: You are chosen (1 Peter 2:9) – You are worthy (1 Corinthians 6:11)

As God’s children, knowing who we are in Christ is essential for our spiritual success. If we don’t know the Truth, God’s Word, we won’t know God or ourselves, which can result in spiritual damage. We find Jesus tempted by Satan in Matthew 4:1-11. Although He is God, He was led by the Spirit to be tempted with the same three temptations common to man. In addition, Jesus models for us three basic human needs that can help us understand ourselves in relationship to God.

Matthew 4:1-11 (NIV):

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. 2 After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. 3 The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” 4 Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” 5 Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. 6 “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written: “‘He will command his angels concerning you,
 and they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’” 7 Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’” 8 Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. 9 “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.” 10 Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.’” 11 Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.”

Let’s review:

  • Jesus was led by the Holy Spirit
  • He fasted, then he was tempted
  • He knew who He was and was sure of His relationship with His Father
  • He knew the Truth, word of God, and used it to defeat the tempter

As we can see, Jesus was tempted with the same temptations we face today. We are not alone in our struggles. Although He is God, He understands us because He experienced it Himself. Hebrews 2:17 says, “For this reason he had to be made like his brothers in every way, in order that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people.” (NIV) Don’t you just love that? He did it for us. He did it for you!

Let’s look at the three common temptations and how these are rooted in three basic human needs:

  1. Primitive Level – Human Need to Trust

Tempter says, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”

Truth says, “He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your ancestors had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.” – Deuteronomy 8:3 (NIV)

This temptation is rooted at the primitive level; the human need to trust. The first thing the tempter mentions is bread. How we love our food! But it goes beyond the belly. We are like infants in great need to be taken care of. It’s about being able to attach to someone who we trust and feel safe. We long to be able to trust others, but with imperfect relationships come feelings of disappointment.

Unfortunately, we tend to view God from that same tainted lens. That’s where the tempter comes in and brings in fear masked by worry. We worry about what we will eat, wear and how we will pay next month’s mortgage, etc. You see, we are hard wired for survival. If we go back to the beginning, Adam and Eve took matters into their own hands. They did not trust God. They jumped the gun and began wandering in the Ifs… We know the results – separation from God.

Trust God: God will provide your basic needs (Philippians 4:19) – Jesus is the bread of life (John 6:35)

  1. Relational Level – Human Need for Love

Tempter says, If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written: “‘He will command his angels concerning you,
 and they will lift you up in their hands,
 so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’”

Truth says, “Do not put the Lord your God to the test as you did at Massah.” – Deuteronomy 6:16 (NIV)

In this second temptation, the tempter brings about our need for relationship – to be loved. God created us for relationship with Him and others. It’s interesting that Satan would tempt Jesus’ knowledge of who God is. You see, if we don’t know God, we don’t know ourselves. In this temptation, we find that when there is relationship with God, there is a sense of safety. Safety is built on trust. Trust is built on relationship.

Jesus knew God; he knew that God was trustworthy, so there was no need to test God’s character. Why? Because His relationship was built on love! God loved His Son. Jesus had a relationship with His Father. Therefore, He did not need to please others nor please His own pride by tempting God.

Receive God’s Love: God loves you (John 3:16) – He will protect you (2 Samuel 22:3-4)

  1. Core Level – Human Need for Identity

Tempter says, “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.”

Truth says, “Fear the Lord your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name.” – Deuteronomy 6:13 (NIV)

The last temptation deals with our core need for identity. Notice how the tempter uses the word “if” in all his statements. He tries to confuse us by instilling doubt about our identity in Christ. As humans we are in a quest to understand who we are, what we were created for and for our purpose in life. It is so vital for us to Biblically define our beliefs about God, self and others. We cannot be defined without Christ. Being rooted in Christ means knowing the fear of God, which is the motivation for all decisions.  Not knowing our true identity will lead to self-indulgence, search for power, bowing down to idols, which leaves us with a false sense of identity.

Embrace Your Identity in Christ: You are chosen (1 Peter 2:9) – You are worthy (1 Corinthians 6:11)

I do pray that after reading this your eyes may be opened to see the importance of knowing that the tempter is out to deceive, but that you are a conqueror because of Christ. Remember, the tempter always has a secondary plan or gain that leads us toward destruction. In order to gain, we have to give a part of ourselves. Is that worth it? After everything that Christ done for us will we allow these temptations to lure us in? I pray we keep our focus on Christ. He will give us the daily strength to endure and defeat the tempter. But we have to believe who we are in Christ. If you doubt your identity, practice believing God’s truth by reading and meditating on it daily. With time, it will become rooted in your mind, heart and soul.

(Listen to God’s I am Promises here)

Rest in His Word: Jeremiah 1:5

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.” (NIV)

Heart Checkup:

  • List two ways you have been tempted in each of the three categories.
  • How have you tried to defeat the temptation?
A New Wardrobe

A New Wardrobe – Six “MUST HAVE” Pieces

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A New Wardrobe

Restoring our inner wardrobes is a lifelong process, but while on that journey, we need to replace old garments with new ones.

In the fashion world, they say there are certain pieces we “must have” in our wardrobe. These are: (1) white shirt, (2) black pencil skirt for women or black slacks for men, (3) dark wash jeans, (4) khaki pants, (5) trench coat, and (6) comfortable stylish shoes. Now, I don’t know about you, but I would rather know what God says about what pleases Him than what the “experts” tell me I must wear this season, which is always changing.

God’s idea of a wardrobe is different than the world’s perspective. He never changes. He is only interested on what goes on inside of us – our intentions and motives – our heart.  The world is in constant competition for the “best dressed,” or the most “beautiful” person, which leaves many of us feeling gloomy about our self-image. God’s plan for you is to feel your best inside, which will have an effect on the outside. Instead of listening to the world’s designers, let us go to the “Ultimate Clothing Designer,” who can transform our inner wardrobe. *

Restoring our inner wardrobes is a lifelong process, but while on that journey, we need to replace old garments with new ones. Now, let’s examine what God’s standards are when it come to those “must have” pieces. In Colossians 3:12-14, we find six must have pieces for our Inner Wardrobe:

  • “So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” (MSG)

What a relief… I have read this passage many times before, but for some reason this time it stood out. What great honor it is to first of all be “chosen by God.” I remember my younger years and being last to be chosen by team members – not the best feeling! But God chose me to be “holy and dearly loved.” That sure makes me want to please Him. So, part of choosing a new wardrobe is recognizing that you wearing these garments to please God. You are doing it for Him. Yet, God is so good that there are so many benefits when we begin clothing ourselves with these six garments. Let’s look at each one more closely…

Must Have Piece #1 – Compassion

Part of your new wardrobe requires you have compassion or mercy. I love this word – COMPASSION. This word was the inspiration for this blog. Jesus was the ultimate compassionate healer. He felt deep sorrow for everyone who was hurting (you and me). But he not only felt – his compassion moved him to alleviate the suffering of the world! He died on the cross for you and me.

So, how can we clothe ourselves with compassion? There are so many opportunities to extend our hand and help someone in need. I encourage you to begin with your immediate family and friends. Ask yourself the following: What are others around me struggling with? Am I so caught up in my own life that I can’t or won’t see the pain around me? I love the song; I Refuse, by Josh Wilson. Here’s a bit of the lyrics – YouTube the song and hear it for inspiration.

Sometimes I, I just want to close my eyes

And act like everyone’s alright

When I know they’re not

This world needs God, but it’s easier to stand and watch

I could pray a prayer and just move on

Like nothing’s wrong

Like the lyrics say, sometimes we just feel like closing our eyes and not see the reality we live in. God wants for us to wake up. Clothe yourself with COMPASSION! Do something. Refuse not to move!

  • Heart Questions: “How do I respond to someone in need?” “What are the barriers that prevent me from moving when I see a need?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Compassion today:

  • Bring blankets and food to a family in need
  • Volunteer at a senior community center
  • Sponsor a child in need

Must Have Piece #2 – Kindness

Now, some of you may be thinking that compassion and kindness are very similar. Although they are related, they are very different. Here’s how – Compassion is God’s heart beating inside of us – what pulls us to make the choice and help someone in need. Kindness is God’s hands extending and meeting that need. The two work together side by side. Kindness always follows compassion.

Some translations use the word goodness. I could sure use some goodness in my life. I guess what I’m trying to say is that when we are kind we have the opportunity to show someone a glimpse of God’s love. Our words need to be followed by actions. It’s not enough to say to someone, “I love you,” if you don’t show it in your behavior.

  • Heart Questions: “In what ways do I shown kindness to my family?” “Is my attitude in harmony with the words I use?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Kindness today:

  • Hug a hurting friend
  • Let someone go before you in line
  • Write a note of encouragement and mail it (the old fashion way)

Must Have Piece #3 – Humility

This word is not popular in our society, nor is it within Christian circles. We just don’t like to hear the word humble nor have someone identify us as being humble. Being humble is to lower yourself in importance or ranking. You don’t like that right? God has commanded us to “do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8 It is not an option. We need humility in order to receive forgiveness. We cannot come to God in an arrogant state and believe that He will be pleased with us. It requires that we come humbly before God, acknowledge our need of Him and repent from our ways.

The opposite of humility is pride. Many individuals are walking around with huge heads ready to tumble down due to their arrogance, which has a negative impact on their relationships. Pride corrupts the heart and mind – it creates a barrier between you and God, which impacts the way you interact with others. Humility allows a closer relationship with God, deeper intimacy with Him results in richer and satisfying relationships with others. I don’t know about you, but humility sounds a lot better than pride.

  • Heart Questions: “Am I a teachable person?” “Do I tend to compete against my spouse or loved ones?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Humility today:

  • Acknowledge your mistakes
  • Welcome feedback/advice from others
  • Accept apologies and ask for forgiveness

Must Have Piece #4 – Quiet Strength

This is one of my favorite pieces. Now, it’s not an easy one because we live in a society that emphasizes the need to be outspoken regardless of the impact it has on the other person. When people defend themselves it is seen as a positive quality. God’s word doesn’t say not to be outspoken, rather that when we do speak, we do it in a manner worthy of being called followers of Christ. We don’t need to put people down, raise our voice and undermine others’ abilities in order to be heard.

Let’s not confuse quietness with weakness. On the contrary, someone clothed with Quiet Strength (or gentleness) is a strong and wise person. It requires the person to be sensitive to the needs of others, to be empathic to those hurting and to be honest with others. This in itself requires much discernment and proper timing. It’s the ability to speak to someone who is in the wrong path with a firm, but loving voice.

  • Heart Questions: “How is my language lately?” “Am I building others up with my words or am I tearing them down?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Quiet Strength today:

  • Be aware of other’s needs
  • Speak the truth in love
  • Resist the urge to talk about others unkindly

Must Have Piece #5 – Discipline

When it comes to discipline, many of us cringe at the thought of having to be disciplined because it requires patience with ourselves and with others. This can be very draining for some of us. We want others to change, but when it comes to changing ourselves, we make up so many excuses to make up for the guilt we carry. Patience shortages result in broken relationships. We need to get back to basics – let’s put our priorities in order.

I want to emphasize that there is no such thing as willpower or self-discipline apart from God. Our energy and motivation comes from God. He equips us to do all things. Doing it on our own merit will only result in temporary relief, but allowing God to move through us will produce eternal transformation.

  • Heart Questions: “How do I tend to respond when I’m provoked?” “What are some ways I can show patience to my spouse or loved ones?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Discipline today:

  • Listen without judging or making corrections
  • Stay away from temptations
  • Have a plan, and follow through

Must Have Piece #6 – Love

Now, we get to the most important piece in your new wardrobe – LOVE. Colossians 3:14 says, “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Love is the only item in your wardrobe that makes all your pieces coordinate in perfect harmony. Without love, your wardrobe will not make sense.

Now, let’s back up to verse 13. Before we can practice loving, it is required of us to “forgive whatever grievances” we may have with others. Forgiveness is the ultimate demonstration of love. I know, here we go again with the forgiveness topic. Part of “putting on love” is learning to embrace God’s forgiveness in our lives and extend that same grace and mercy to others. I truly encourage you to read post – A Beautiful Word – for more on forgiveness.

  • Heart Questions: “What are some of the resentments I need to leg go of?” “In what ways can I create an atmosphere of love in my home?”

3 ways to clothe yourself with Love today:

  • Give of yourself, especially your time
  • Be fair and honest
  • Learn to give and receive compliments

Congratulations! You are on your way to having a clean, organized and God focused inner wardrobe. Our outward appearance is important, but it should be driven by our inward intention to please God. His desire is for you to live your best, but this will take time and effort on your end. Remember to focus on one item at a time, work on it, enjoy it and be amazed at what God will do. Above all,  remember that when you put on these pieces you are clothing yourself with Christ!

  • Galatians 3:27 – “for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.” 

Rest in His Word: Proverbs 16:7

“When people’s lives please the LORD, even their enemies are at peace with them.”

Heart Checkup:

  • Go back to the Heart Questions and take time to meditate on these before the Lord.
  • Write down the six “Must Have” pieces on a notepad. Choose one to begin working on this week. Take baby steps…
  • Remember, try on the piece, feel the piece move with you and wear it often.

* I want to thank Terra Newsome for her input on “The Ultimate Clothing Designer” phrase – visit her blog at: http://virtuouswoman73.wordpress.com/

Love in Action

15 November 2011

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When you don’t feel like loving, God calls us to make the choice to love. He did. He loved us when we were still sinners (Romans 5:8). He died for us when we despised Him (1 John 4:10). Choose to Love because God chose to love you.

Human love can sometimes feel as it has come to an end, but God’s love endures forever (Psalm 107:1). Some couples that come to counseling express a lack of feelings (good ones at least) toward their spouse. After years of conflict, distance and tension, a thick wall is created. When they attempt to reach out to the other, they feel the cold, rough brick wall, concluding that there must be no more love to give. Their usual response is, “There is no use in staying married if there is no more love.”

It breaks my heart to hear this. Yet, I’m aware that as a society we have twisted the true meaning of love. We use the word love for everything; I love your bag, I love my new pet, I love the new stove, etc… This kind of love is Conditional, Withholding, and Temporary. Now, the most commonly used Greek word translated “love” in the New Testament is “agape.” This is the Love God has for us – Unconditional, Sacrificial, and Never Ending. What a difference right?

Now, I’m not suggesting that we can ever reach to love the way God loves us, but we can definitely strive for it. My reply to couples is that love is a choice. Yes, you chose your spouse. You chose to make a vow to keep the marriage covenant. When you don’t feel like loving, God calls us to make the choice to love. He did. He loved us when we were still sinners (Romans 5:8). He died for us when we despised Him (1 John 4:10). Choose to Love because God chose to love you.

As an action word, love is not passive, but ACTIVE. The famous passage we quote on love comes from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8:

“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.”

Is this how you love your significant other? Is this the way you love others? We all fall short don’t we? I know I do, just ask my husband.  (Ok don’t)… In this definition, love is not described as a warm, fuzzy feeling in the pit of your stomach. Or that it feels like butterflies. Or that it gives you chills. Instead, it gives us action words we can implement (practice) on a daily basis to help us get on that road to loving as God intended. Yes, I said on a daily basis, not only when you feel like it.

Because love is active, it requires sacrifice. Jesus sacrificed His life for us. He gave ALL of himself for us. He did not care that we didn’t love Him the same. He took that risk for you, so won’t you take that risk for your marriage? If we claim to be followers of Christ and we don’t love, then we don’t love God. Why? Because God is love (1 John 4:8). Wow! Did that hit you?

If you truly don’t feel love for your spouse, begin to ask the Lord to give you His heart. Take the action step to live out this love defined in 1 Corinthians. Be patient with your husband, despite his sarcastic tone. Be kind to your wife, even if she doesn’t seem to notice the changes you’ve made. Keep persevering till the end. God is with you and will give you the strength and wisdom. Remember, Love Never Fails!!

Rest in His Word: Psalm 26:2-3

“2 Test me, LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; 3 for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness.” (NIV)

Heart Checkup:

  • Take a journal and pray the above Psalm.
  • Ask the Lord to examine your heart. Wait for his answer and write it down.
  • What is God requiring of you in this broken relationship you are struggling with?
  • Have you been actively practicing the action words given in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8? If not, what is stopping you?

Heart Deposits

26 October 2010

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We may not always get to choose what we deposit into our hearts. But, we can choose what we withdraw.

I went to the bank yesterday to make a deposit. We recently changed banks at work, so I had to speak to the teller regarding some issues. She informed me that I cannot go over 10 checks or there will be a charge of 17 cents per check. Wow! I thought, “I need to be careful not to go over 10 checks per transaction or else this will get expensive.”

On my way to the office, I began thinking of how our hearts work like a banking system. Let me explain. You see, we too have a bank where we deposit our dreams, desires, disappointments and heartbreaks – our HEART. So, since we deposit into this account on a daily basis, we need to be careful of what information enters as well as how and when this information is withdrawn.

From our hearts spring forth the thoughts and words that are in the deepest part of our soul. Matthew 15:18-19 says, “But evil words come from an evil heart and defile the person who says them. For from the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, all other sexual immorality, theft, lying, and slander.”

Unfortunately, our words have the power to HURT or to HEAL. We hurt others with a very small part of our body – the tongue. We can either use it to spark a great fire of gossips and lies or we can use it to edify and encourage. We may not always get to choose what we deposit into our hearts. But, we can choose what we withdraw. Once we are ready to make a withdrawal, our hearts will reveal our true intentions.

Rest in His Word: Psalm 19:14

“May the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart be pleasing to you, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.” (NLT)

Heart Checkup:

  • Check the condition of your heart – Psalm 139:23-24
  • Listen and think before you speak – James 1:19-20
  • Deal with your anger, don’t let it stir within – Matthew 5:25-26, Ephesians 4:26-27
  • Ask God for help daily – Psalm 141:3, Psalm 19:14